"I think there is a risk of overreacting," says Zimmerman, who cites Motrin's pulling of an ad a group of mommy bloggers found objectionable as an example of an overreaction. She believes that Motrin, based on the reaction of a relatively small group of unhappy mothers, probably pulled the ad too soon.    

Of course, there's also the risk of overreacting by taking things personally.

"I would not engage in flame wars," cautions Barenblat, using this combustible term for tit-for-tat exchanges that can quickly erupt into out-of-control fires.

Carr recommends that brands, even if the person or group going after them is in the wrong, weigh the pros and cons of playing hardball. He gives the example of an executive client who gave an interview to a blogger and was subsequently misquoted. Upset, the executive sent the blogger a string of less-than-appropriate emails, some threatening legal action, all of which were promptly posted on the blog. This triggered a chain reaction from the readers, most of whom felt the executive's response implied that he and his company might have something to hide.

"That was a bad reaction," Carr says, pointing out how much better the situation could've been handled had the executive come to him first. "It's like classic negotiation. You have to think about what does that person have to lose? What's their real motivation? Are they just trying to get a rise out of you, or do they really want to accomplish something? If they want to accomplish something, think about how you can help them accomplish it and keep yourself out of the mud."

Not only keep yourself clean, but perhaps even smelling like a rose -- which brings us to our final suggestion.